The Entrustment of Amelia AiChun

What a day! Thank you to Dad for posting earlier - I just couldn't leave Amelia. She is now sleeping peacefully, as are both my dad and Sara. I am headed that way soon.

This has been the most amazing, wonderful, gut-wrenching, heart-breaking, faith-building day ever. First, I must tell you all that Amelia is perfect in every way. She is gutsy, smart, beautiful and all-together wonderful.

She seems very smart and independent. She likes books and drawing on paper. She seems to be potty-trained - we had a couple of successful visits to the ladies' room today. She is very neat - if she spills on herself, she immediately reaches for something to wipe it up. I can't tell yet about a sense of humor - no smiles just yet. That's okay, she had a big day today, with not much to smile about.

We met Amelia's foster family at the Civil Affairs Office. They obviously loved her very much. They were heart-broken to be leaving her. The mother was very nervous and just could not let go of AiChun. Her body was racked with sobs once she finally had to say goodbye. They brought me Chunie's favorite bowl and spoon, along with some family photos, a bag of the rice milk she is used to, and two bags of her favorite snacks. It was absolutely the most sad thing I have ever seen. I felt so torn- thrilled to finally be getting Amelia, and devastated for this woman's loss.

The foster mother and sister left, and then it was time for us to leave. That's when Amelia Chun realized she was coming with us. She was not happy about it, either!!! She cried and refused to walk, so I picked her up and carried her. I felt more like a kidnapper than a mother. If I loved her so much, how could I cause such pain? I kept repeating to myself "be strong and courageous" and "Father, help me." She quieted in the cab, but began to wail again once we arrived at the hotel.

We took her to the room and tried to entertain her, but no luck. She cried and cried her little heart out. I know it's healthy and normal, but it was so terribly sad. I tried not to cry, too, but I did a couple of times. She kept putting on her coat and trying to go to the door. This went on for a couple of hours. After that, I decided to walk the halls of the hotel with her. She walked up and down the halls calling out "Mama? Baba?" - that's "Mommy? Daddy?" in Chinese. After about 15 laps, she quit calling for them. After another 15 laps, she let me touch her. After another 15 laps, she decided I was going to be her new security person.

By the time Dad & Sara returned with a dinner plan, Amelia Chun had decided that she would allow me to touch her, feed her and play with her. I stepped into my dad's room out of her sight for a minute, and she even came into the room to find me! She drank water from Dad's water bottle, wrote on paper, played with her phone and was generally pretty content. Not happy, but content.

Now, I know I said Amelia would have to learn to like chicken. However, after the trauma of the day, what kind of mother would I be if I didn't order my daughter her favorite food for dinner? Yes, friends, I ordered fish head soup from room service and allowed it to be brought to my room for Amelia. SHE ATE IT! What's more, she let me feed her. That was completely worth it.

The best part of the day happened just a little while ago. Amelia started to whimper again. I went over and picked her up and put her in my lap. She allowed me to do this! Then, she put her head on my shoulder. I rocked her, and she fell asleep in my arms.

All in all, a wonderful and awful day rolled into one. She is mine, and I am hers, whether she likes it or not. Right now, she doesn't like it so much. I know things may get worse before they get better, but I am praying for progress each day. Amelia is a wonderful, beautiful gift from the Lord. I can't believe He has allowed me the honor of being her new mother.

Amy